Fragmented
by Charlie-Rose94
Summary: Something is wrong with James will the guys be there to support him through what is probably one of the hardest time of his life. Kames fic.
1. Chapter 1

**So this is my first story I hope it is good :) **

**Warning this story will be an eventual Slash between Kendall and James If you have a problem with that then please do not read or leave any Flames for it.**

**This is rated T for now but may go up to M later**

**Let me know what you think and all mistakes are mine.**

**Enjoy.**

**Disclamer: I do not own anything to do with Big Time Rush**

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**James POV**

In. Out. In. Out.

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

It is just what I have to keep doing to ignore them.

1… 2… 3… 4… 5

Step to the left, backflip.

'_You're going to crash'_

CRASH

'Damit leave me alone'

"JAMES WHAT WAS THAT?"

"Sorry Gustavo I missed the landing."

Kendall stuck his hand out to help me up "Come on buddy up you get" he said with a smile.

'_Why take his hand he is just going to kill you in your sleep, they are all out to get you little Jamie.'_

'Shut up! Leave me ALONE! Kendall would never hurt me.'

I took Kendall's hand and he helped me up off the floor.

"You okay James?"

"Yeah, fine, just a bruised ego." I said with a small chuckle, though I wasn't really fine I was freaking out, what if they're right, the voices, and everyone really was out to get me.

I started pulling at my hair a nervous thing that I had picked up to try and make the voices stop but they keep talking to me.

'_Why wouldn't they be out to get you? What are you to them the 'pretty one' the Face of Big Time Rush? You are nothing really, they could go on without you.'_

'Shut up. Shut up. Please'

"James, are you okay?" Carlos asked.

I looked up and saw that everyone was looking at me.

"What? Oh I'm fine, why?" I looked around trying my hardest to ignore the voices telling me that they were out to get me, it was very hard and was getting harder each moment that passed.

"You were pulling at your hair and muttering to yourself." Kendall answered looking at me funny.

'_He is thinking, what is the best way to lock you up in the nut house'_

'No. No. Kendall would never do that.'

"I'm fine I just need some air. I will be back in a moment." I said and left the dance studio to go outside for a bit.

'_I see why you have so much faith in Kendall… hmm… You love him… Wow, you know he would never love you back. Why would he love you? You don't deserve to be loved.'_

Why won't they just shut up I sat on a bench outside, people were staring at me, they are all after me. I just carried on sitting and pulling at my hair hoping it would all just go away. I am all alone.

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**Well what do you think? Shall I continue?**

**Please Review :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**So this is Chapter two hope you all enjoy it :)**

**All mistakes are mine **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Big Time Rush just the plot. :) **

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**Kendall POV **

Something has been going on with James recently and I have no idea what. It's annoying that I can't help him sometimes he gets this look in his eyes that's begging for help but I don't know how to.

We have been home from the studio for a while now a James is asleep on the sofa; I remembered the studio after he left and when I found him outside.

_Flashback_

_James had just left the studio._

"_What's going on with James he hasn't been himself for over a week now?" Carlos asked._

"_I don't know I have never seen him act this way before." I said._

"_Well whatever it is, is affecting his performance so FIX IT!" Gustavo yelled at us, which was not helpful since we don't know what to fix._

"_I'm going to go see if James is okay I will see you guys in a bit." They knew that meant that I wanted to go see him alone for a few moments to see if I could get him to talk. Though we were all best friends I had known James the longest and he open up to me more than the others. _

_When I got outside I saw him sitting on a bench pulling at his hair and muttering again I knew there was something seriously wrong he looked so lost._

_I walked over to him and sat down next to him and I caught some of what he was saying; "No… no… hurt me." _

"_James…" I said slowly so I didn't scare him, he looked so afraid but I had no idea what of._

"_K… Kendall…" he looked up at me and saw the tears in his eyes and the scared look._

"_Make them stop Kendall, they won't leave me alone." He said with a sob as he broke down on my shoulder._

"_Make what stop?" I asked I had no idea what he was going on about._

"_Them the voices can't you hear them? They keep talking to me, and why do people keep looking at me? I think their plotting something… They don't want me anymore…" He just carried on rambling becoming incoherent._

"_Okay… okay… shhh… it's all going to be okay." I sat there rubbing his back trying to calm him I knew I had to get him back home._

"_Okay James I'm going to take you home now, okay?" I said and slowly eased him up off the bench with me. He hadn't shown any reaction that he had heard me at all. He was still muttering to himself and pulling at his hair as I lead him back home._

_On the way back to The Palm Woods I texted Logan to say that I had taken James home and that I would meet him there later. _

_End of Flash Back_

Once we got back to 2J I sat him on the sofa and he curled up and went to sleep, this leads me to where I am now sat on the sofa staring at him as he sleeps peacefully. This is the first time that I have seen a peaceful look on his face for ages and it was nice to see instead of the lost and scared look that he had when I found earlier, though I could still see the tear tracks down his face.

At that moment the front door opened and I saw Logan and Carlos walk through the door; I stood from the sofa and walked to the kitchen to talk to them.

"How is he?" Logan asked when we were all huddled in the kitchen.

"Not good." I said and looked over at James who was still asleep hadn't even stirred when the door slammed I could only imagine how tired he was. I told them everything that happened when I left the studio all of James rambling, the voices he said he could hear and how he though people were after him.

"Kendall I think we need take James to a hospital." Logan said to me with a sombre look on his face as stared over at James.

"What do you mean?" Carlos asked worriedly looking at Logan, while I just looked down sadly at the floor; I knew what Logan meant it wasn't normal for someone to hear voices and the things that James told me he saw, heard and thinks. I shake my head I really didn't want him to go through this he is my best friend, he maybe cocky and may seem like he cares for no one but himself and his looks but that's not true. He is also so sweet, kind and was protective of everyone he loved; I wish I had the courage to tell him that I love him.

"I guess we will have to try and get him to a hospital without thinking we are 'after him'" I said with a sad sigh, I looked back at James sleeping peacefully I guess I won't see that for much longer, so I soaked up the peaceful look on his face before he wakes up.

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**So I hoped you enjoyed it please let me know what you think :) **

**Review Please :) **


	3. Chapter 3

**So here is the next chapter let me know what you think. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Big Time Rush **

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**Kendall POV**

Now we have got to try and get James to the hospital without him freaking out. We know that something is wrong with him, because of what he has been saying to me he will probably think that we are trying to get rid of him or something; which is not true we just want to get him some help.

At the moment he is still asleep on the sofa, we have figured we will probably need to speak to my mum first as she will know what to do better than us and she is our legal guardian and would need to be at the hospital when we take James.

We also need to call James mum at some point but not sure when to call, might wait until we actually know what is going on, I suggested to Logan and Carlos to wait and ask my mum what to do with Brooke.

Just at the moment mum and Katie walked through the front door. When they saw James asleep on the sofa and our sombre looks, they knew right away that something was wrong. Katie maybe ten but she was very intelligent (scares me sometimes.) I wasn't sure how she would handle this though.

"What's going on?" My mum asked looking on worriedly at James asleep on the sofa and so did Katie.

So we told mum everything that had happened today and everything that James had told me while I was with him earlier.

"Katie, go to your room or to the pool while I talk to the boys please." Mum said her face not showing at all what she is thinking.

"But mum I want to know what's going on. James is as much my big brother as Kendall is." Katie said with her usual stubbornness.

"Katie, just do as you are told. Please." My mum said losing her cool more quickly than usual.

Katie stomped off to her room without another word noticing our mum wasn't going to change her mind this time around.

"We are going to have to take him to the hospital and call Brooke." She said and she started mumbling about what to say to her on the phone.

"Call her now? We thought that we would wait until we know what is going on since we don't really know what is going on." Logan said.

My mum looked at him with a raised eye-brow. "We will call her on the way to the hospital she needs to know. It doesn't matter whether we know much or not she needs to know that there is something wrong with her son."

We all were silent for a while just thinking how screwed up this all was at the moment, I turned to look at them all; Logan looked very worried and upset, poor Carlos just looked so confused at what was going on, but also looked really serious and my mum just looked worried and had her thinking face on, probably thinking about what to tell Brooke.

"I guess we need to think about how to get James to a hospital." I said looking at the others.

We started to hear moaning coming from the sofa, we looked over and saw that James was stirring on the sofa I slowly made my way over to be there when he woke up fully.

"Kendall…" He started whimpering.

"James… Jamie, wake up, I'm here." I said touching him softly on the shoulder to try and keep him calm.

He opened his eyes looking at me; there was fear in them still and a heart-breaking sadness as well.

"James…" Carlos said walking over to him slowly to him. James shrank back a bit once he noticed that everyone was looking at him.

"Kendall, they're staring, do you see it in their eyes? There after me, gonna lock me up." He whispered to me.

Suddenly he got tears in his eyes and started pulling at his hair and whimpering. "Make it stop Kendall, please." He said.

I grab his hand and held it mine and look at him in the eye. "It's okay Jamie. We are going to get you help and the voices will go away okay?" I said looking at him.

"I'm not crazy, they are here I can hear them." He said looking at me with tears in his eyes.

"I know James, I know." I said looking up at the others for some help; I could tell it is going to be a struggle to get him to a hospital to get checked out. The others looked back at me looking very worried too.

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**So here it is what did you think? Please Review :D**

**So did you guys hear Parallel by Heffron Drive Amazing XD **


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the late update I was too busy last weekend to get up so sorry.**

**Thanks to everyone who has Favourited or followed or reviewed means a lot so thank you.**

**I wrote most of this really late at night so I hope spelling and things are okay.**

**All mistakes are mine.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing **

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**James POV**

I had locked myself in the bathroom; I had to be safe they are after me saying they are going to take me to the hospital to get me help but they are taking me there to kill me or are handing me over to the government ( I know they are watching me) .

I hear banging on the door bit I don't answer it, this is the only place I am safe, they can't get me here.

'_You could just kill yourself make it all go away.' _My annoying voice told me. I rolled up my sleeve s and looked at the lines on the inside of my wrist.

I had started cutting when the voices started; no one knew about them since I started wearing long sleeves and I wear all my fan made bangles to hide them.

I decided that maybe the annoying voice could be right that maybe it could make it all go away. I decided to break a razor to get the blade; I started making small cuts across my inner wrist.

"James… Jamie buddy, open the door please." I heard Kendall through the door.

"It doesn't stop." I whimpered back as I carried on cutting into my wrist.

"What doesn't Jamie?" he asked softly.

"The voices… Why can't you hear them? They don't stop…" I said pressing harder on the blade.

"Just let me in James, I can help you."

"You can't, it will all stop soon." Pressing harder, deeper.

"I am coming in James." I heard him tell Carlos to kick the door down.

I didn't care I just carried on cutting.

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**Kendall POV**

Carlos kicked the door open and I ran, I couldn't believe what I was seeing; James sat by the bath cutting into his wrist muttering to himself. I slowly walked over to him when I got closer I could hear him clearer.

"Make it stop, make it stop… Okay… Okay… Make it stop…" He just said it over and over again.

When I got to him I kneeled down beside him and I gently took the razor from him, he looked up at me confused.

"James you have to stop." I said softly.

"I can't they won't let me."

"Who won't Jamie?" I asked while I got a towel from the rock and wrapped James' wrists in it to stop the bleeding.

"Them." He just said as if I knew. He looked so out of it.

"Kendall we need to get him to a hospital." I heard my mum say to me.

"I know." I said softly as not to frighten James as he stared at the wall.

"I'm going to phone ahead let them know we are coming." She said and left the room.

Logan and Carlos were still here, but I wasn't paying attention to them I just knew I had to get James up and out of here. The simplest way I thought was to carry him to the car, as all he seemed to be doing was staring at the wall and was calm , I knew now would be my best chance.

"James I am going to pick you up now and get you out of here." I said but he still wasn't paying attention to me, so I just went and picked him up.

"Kendall what are you doing? We can't leave they will get me! No. No. No. No." he kept screaming and struggling in my arms as he realised we were leaving the apartment.

When we go to the elevator I tried to calm him down, I knew if James was in his right mind he wouldn't want to be seen this way.

"Come on James, it's going to be fine. I won't let anything happen to you, okay?" I said holding him in my arms tight to my body to try and keep him still.

"There are going to get me Kendall, don't let them take me please."

"I won't Jamie, I promise."

My heart was breaking at the sight of him looking up at me so helpless. He had calmed down enough for me to walk through the lobby of The Palm Woods with out to of a problem.

When people did as what was going on with James, I would just say that James had cut his hands on a piece of broken glass, they couldn't tell anyway since his hands were wrapped in a towel.

Mum had already pulled the car around and I got into the back with Logan and Carlos as well with James sat on my lap. James was still muttering to himself not making any sense at all now. I stroked his hair trying to keep calm. I hate feeling so helpless, I wish that I could take all of his pain go away and make him feel better.

When we got to the hospital there were doctors and nurses ready with a stretcher, the others got out of the car before me I saw my mum walk over to talk to them. Logan opened the car door for me and I got out with James. He looked around and when he saw all the doctors and nurses his eyes went wide and started freaking out. He was thrashing about in my arms screaming at me.

He continues like that until a nice calm looking nurse walked over to us and smiled gently, then she stuck a needle in his arms, he started getting weaker and then went limp in my arms. I walked over to the stretcher and laid him on it and they wheeled him off.

I didn't even realise that I had started crying until I felt wet on my check.

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**I hope you liked it. I know there isn't much Logan or Carlos yet but I promise there will be more of them soon, I am just settign up James' and Kendall's relationship.**

**Please review :)  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I own nothing just the OC's**

**Here's the next Chapter sorry it's late but hope this is good**

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far and followed or favourite it. **

_**Soundwave of Cybertron -**_**You will find out in this chapter what is going on, hope you like it.  
**

_**Coleswagger**_**\- Thanks for your reviews and glad your enjoying it.**

_**Logan**_**\- I know that was actually hard to write hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**All mistakes are mine, enjoy:)  
**

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**Mrs Knight POV**

I had never seen James look so broken before; I have to call his mum she will need to get on the first flight out of Minnesota.

I walked over to a quiet corner in the waiting room so as not to disturb anyone while I called Brooke, but could still keep an eye on the boys and Katie. They all looked so lost and worried, and Kendall, my little boy. He tries to hide it hard but I know that he is in love with James he just afraid to get his heart broken, but I know he won't and today just proved it, James would only let Kendall near him everyone else was 'out to get him' but not Kendall.

"Hello?" I was broken out of my thoughts by Brooke's voice.

"Hi, Brooke it's me."

"Jennifer? Is everything okay?" she asked, god this was going to be hard, she might be a workaholic but she loves James so much, I remember when she tried to bring him back to Minnesota under the ruse of working for her company, because she missed him so much.

"It's James we have just had to bring into the hospital. He seems to have had a break down or something we are waiting for the doctor to come back."

"W-w-what? I am going to get on the first plain out there I will call you when I get my flight details. What hospital are you at?" she said in a rush I could hear banging around in the back ground as she packed up.

"UCLA Medical centre I will call you before you get on the plane if I hear anything." I said to her.

"Okay, thanks Jen" She said and hanged up.

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**Minnesota – Mrs Diamond POV**

I just hanged up on Jennifer, my little boy. I have to get to LA as fast as possible; I looked around my office to make sure I had everything I needed before I went home to pack some clothes to leave, I left my office and walked over to my assistant.

"I am leaving to see my son in LA, I don't want any calls about work for a while okay?" I said to her with what I hoped was a serious voice but even I could hear my voice was shaking.

"Yes, I understand who do you want in charge while you're away?" She asked looking worried at me.

"Just put Lily in charge okay?" I said looking at her, trying to not to cry.

"Okay, are you okay Brooke? Is your son?" She asked.

"He's in the hospital so I don't know… I need to go." I said and left. I needed to get home and pack to see my baby boy.

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**LA UCLA Medical Centre – Katie POV**

I can't believe this is happening to James, he is such a sweet guy he doesn't deserve this. He is another big brother to me. It was so sweet how he went all big brother when I went out with Kyle, it was annoying but sweet.

I just hope that he is okay.

**Carlos POV**

I don't really know what is going on with James but I know that it is not good. I have never imagined that James could be this way; he is always funny and happy all the time, but not recently. He has been quiet, sad and withdrawn from us, I miss my friend who would play X-Box with me and eat pie on the sofa, and he hasn't done that since all this started a few weeks ago.

I miss my best friend/ brother already; I wish the doctors would just hurry up and tell us what is going on with him, I need to know that he will get better and is okay.

**Logan POV**

I don't even know what to think anymore, James is such a good person he really does not deserve whatever is going on with him and Kendall he tries to hide it but it is obvious that he is in love with James. He must be so torn up on the inside; I have no idea what to say to comfort him, when I can't even reassure myself.

I really want to know what is going on with him what made him break like that, I feel like I should know, I'm supposed to be the smart one who knows everything, and I am so frustrated. Where is the doctor it's been over an hour?

"I have spoken to James mum and she going to get here as fast as she can." Mrs Knight said as she came and sat down between Kendall and Katie opposite me and Carlos.

We sat waiting another half an hour in that time Mrs Diamond managed to call Mrs Knight back to say she was boarding a plane here already before the doctor came out.

"James Diamond's family" he called out.

"That's us, how's James?" Kendall said standing up, looking anxious as to what he was about to say.

"I am Doctor Harrison James doctor. Has his mother arrived yet?" He asked.

"She is on her way here she should be here soon. I am his guardian here in LA, you can tell us." Mrs Knight said looking at the doctor.

"How's James?" Kendall asked again getting impatient.

"Well, he is fine physically, we had to do a blood transfusion, but mentally he is not okay we had to sedate him to bandage his wrists. We called down a psychologist once he woke up and she is in there talking to him right now, in fact here she comes now." He said looking behind us, we turn and saw a woman smartly dressed in a white doctor's coat holding a clip board.

"Hello I am Doctor Alison Hanson are you James Diamond's mother?" she asked Mrs Knight.

"No I am his guardian his mother is on a plane here, is he okay?"

"So far from just talking to him I am going towards Paranoid Schizophrenia."

Oh shit. I looked around no one seemed to have anything to say, and Kendall just looked broken.

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**I hoped you liked it and was worth the wait.  
**

**Reviews will make me very happy :) **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey everyone so sorry for the long wait been very busy with work and coursework and the chapter took ages to come together for some reason. This chapter was written late at night hope there aren't too many mistakes.  
**

**Thanks to all who are reviewing and still reading.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with BTR.**

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**Kendall POV**

Schizophrenia! I can't believe it. I knew something was wrong I guess I didn't want to believe it was something this bad; that maybe I was over reacting.

"What happens now?" I heard my mum ask.

"Well he will stay in the room we have him in now while we wait for his mother to arrive to discuss treatment, and our next steps." Doctor Hanson said.

"Can we see him?" I asked in a soft voice.

"You can, we won't be moving him until his mother gets here anyway. He is sleeping right now so not many of you we don't want to overwhelm him when he wakes up." She said.

"I will wait here with Katie for Brooke to turn up; her plane should be landing soon."

"But mum I want to see James." Katie said with a sad voice.

"Let the boys go first, you will see James soon." Mum said stroking her hair soothingly.

"Come on I will take you to see him." Doctor Hanson said with a small smile.

She took us down the hall a room inside was James asleep. I looked at him and I saw that his arms and feet were restrained. "Are those really necessary?" I asked in a small voice as I walked over to side, Logan and Carlos walked to his other side.

"I am afraid so, I will give you some privacy." She said and left the room closing the door behind her.

"He looks so peaceful like this." Carlos said sadly.

"Yeah he does." I said sitting down next to him taking his hand in mind rubbing it soothingly.

We must have been sat there about an hour before he started to stir awaking up.

"James, Jamie…"

He started looking around the room, his breathing started to pick up as he started to panic.

"James it's okay; just calm down." Logan said as I rubbed his arm reassuringly or trying to anyway.

"No, no, no, no, what's going on? Why can't I move? They have me, gonna kill me." He said trying to get up but the restraints were stopping him.

"James no, it is okay your safe, it's me Kendall." I said rubbing his arm. He calmed down a little bit and looked over at me.

"Kendall… They have me you have to help me, I am not crazy, I'm not crazy…" He kept repeating over and over as he banged his head back against his pillows.

"No, no, no, James it's okay we know you're not crazy." I said rubbing his forehead gently "Just relax and go back to sleep." I said.

I looked over at Carlos and Logan they looked upset and a bit at a loss of what to do.

"_Wait a minute before you tell me anything, how was your day? 'Cause I been missing you by my side, yeah" _I started singing and Logan and Carlos started singing too. James calmed down and started staring at me with tears in his before he started falling back to sleep.

Once he fell asleep we stopped singing and I just stared at him not sure what to do next.

"At least he is asleep again and can escape his distorted reality." Logan said with a sigh.

"I am going to see Mrs Knight and Katie, see how far Mrs Diamond is from being here." Carlos said as he left the room.

"I am going to go with Carlos." Logan said and let the room too leaving me with James.

"Oh Jamie I am so sorry this is happening to you." I said as I continued to stroke at his hair. His face was so peaceful at the moment that you would think nothing was wrong with him, that there were no issues at all.

I heard voices outside and the door opened and Brooke Diamond entered the room with Mrs Knight and Doctor Hanson following in.

"How's my baby?" Mrs Diamond asked me.

"He's okay he woke up a while ago and freaked out a little bit but we calmed him down and he fell back to sleep." I said to Mrs Diamond.

She walked over to James and sat next his bed and stroked his hair back. "I knew this might happen." She said with a sigh.

"What do you mean?" ask Mrs Knight walking over to my side.

"My dad had Schizophrenia, its genetic it skipped me and my brother and I hoped it would skip him too."

"I didn't know that." I said looking at James.

"He doesn't know about his Granddad I never told him. My dad never wanted him to know and he does very well at managing it, takes his pills keeps to his routine. Hopefully James will have the same luck."

"We will help him make sure that he stays stable and everything." I said and my mum nodded his head in agreement putting a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

"We will do anything to help." She said.

"Excuse me sorry, to interrupt." Doctor Hanson said, I had actually forgotten that she was in the room.

"Yes what is it?" Mrs Diamond said looking up at her.

"We need to talk about setting up his stay in our psych ward." She said softly.

"Right of course, so how long will it be?" Mrs Diamond said softly looking back at James face.

"Well it will be about a month at least maybe two, dependant on how well he improves and to make sure he has no side effects of the medication."

"Okay, thank you." Mrs Diamond said nodding her head.

"I am going to get all the forms you need to fill out to admit him okay then we will transfer him up to a room." The Doctor said then left the room.

Just then James started to stir again and whimpering.

"Snakes, snakes, snakes, get them off me please." He said whimpering and started to try and move his arms as if to try and swat the 'snakes' away.

"Honey there are no snakes, listen to my voice sweetie." Mrs Diamond said, rubbing James arm soothing.

"Mum?" He said softly turning his head to the side.

"Yes. It's me sweetie." She said softly rubbing his hair away from his forehead.

"Can you see them mum?" he asked with a whisper. "They tell me things"

"No sweetie, just ignore them, they are not real, okay" She said

"I can't." He whimpered looking at the ceiling and started crying and mumbling to himself.

"James… Jamie… listen to me, they're not real, okay just listen to my voice not them." I said he whimpered and turn his face towards me.

"Sing again." He whispered looking at me.

"What song?" I asked.

"Stuck"

"Okay_. __There are so many things that I never ever get to say 'Cause I'm always tongue-tied with my words getting in the way…_"

I carried on singing until the Doctor came back with a few nurses.

"We are going to move James now and only his mum can come right now you will be able to visit again tomorrow."

"I will get the others to come and say goodbye." My mum said.

"Okay." I said

"Kendall, what is going on?" James asked with worry in his voice.

"They are going to take you to another room, with your mum, okay" I said back.

"No, no, no, no." he started getting worked up and trying to get out of the bed; the nurses then came over with the doctor.

"No wait we need to say goodbye." I said just as the other guys came in with my mum and Katie

"James we are all here okay." I said as he started to cry some more shaking his head still looking at me and the guys.

"It's okay we will see you tomorrow okay?" Logan said.

"Yeah buddy, take care man." Carlos said patting James on the shoulder, not that good at goodbyes.

Katie went up and hugged James tight crying, mum followed her. "Take care." She said.

I tapped James arm to get his attention away from the others. "I will see you tomorrow Jamie I will be in as soon as visiting hours start at 8am." I said with a small laugh.

"Please don't leave me Kendall; they will get me, please." He said crying.

"We are ready to take him up now." The Doctor said.

"Okay" I said as me and the other stood back as they got James set up and wheeled out on the bed.

"No, please they will get me." James said as they carried on wheeling him out and we just stood back and watched him go with his mum following.

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**Hope you all enjoyed it. **

**Reviews will make me type faster :) **


	7. Chapter 7

**I know it has been ages since my last post but I had huge writers block for this chapter and then Life got crazy.**

**But here it is and I know its not as long but I like it :)**

**A huge thank you to** Remembering-Sunday514 **Who without there would not be a Chapter 7 as they helped me write this chapter. So Thank You soo much! And anyone who hasn't read Remembering-Sunday514 stories go and read them as they are amazing :) **

**Anyway on with the Chapter :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Big Time Rush. **

**Enjoy**

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**Kendall's POV  
**

The car ride back to the apartment was silent. Katie got to sit in the front seat while Logan, Carlos and I got stuffed in the back.

Carlos was in the middle tangling and untangling his fingers repeatedly and Logan was staring out the window, his face unreadable. I wrapped my arms around my stomach and slouched in my seat leaning gently towards the window leaning my head against the cool glass and staring out at the world, watching as people went about their day to day lives as normal. I wish we could be at the studio right now just doing a hamonies and having Gustavo yelling at us for screwing it up. But no instead we are in car on the way home from committing James.  
It's strange being here without James, and the way he had looked at me when I left him; he looked so lost and betrayed, like I had broken his trust.

I had promised him that I wouldn't leave him and then I did, I will be back tomorrow right at 8 am, hopefully before he wakes up.  
As soon as I got to the apartment I went straight to the bathroom and locked the door. I wanted to be alone for a bit. Being in the bathroom again and seeing James' blood all over the floor made me break and I just started sobbing and I couldn't stop.

After I had calmed down I realised I had dried blood still on my hands and top from where I had helped James earlier. I cleaned up the bathroom where James' blood was now drying before I cleaned up myself and got ready for bed.

**Logan's POV  
**

I took off my shirt and half-assed threw it into my hamper. I could care less about cleanliness right now.  
"Hey, Logan?" Carlos asked quietly, his voice quiet and far away.  
"Yeah, buddy? What's wrong?" I asked while pulling on my pj's before climbing into bed.  
"I'm worried about Kendall?"  
"Kendall?"  
"I don't know, maybe just because he is so close to James." He paused to turn off the light and climb into bed.

"Maybe just because I know that James is somewhere safe. Kendall has to sleep all by himself now. I just don't know what to do. Maybe we should camp out in his and James' room for the night. You know all be together for support."  
I thought about it for a moment, I know Kendall is probably hurting a lot right now. He has known James a lot longer than me and Carlos, he also isn't very subtle with his feelings towards James.

"Okay Carlos lets go." We grabbed our duvets and pillows and walked to Kendall's and James' shared room. When we came in he was curled up on James' bed cuddling his pillow asleep, Carlos took Kendall's bed and I took the floor.

"Goodnight Logan."

" Night Carlos."

"Night Guys." Kendall murmured, I smiled before falling into a deep sleep.

* * *

**Like I said not long but it will help me take the story where it needs to go. **

**My life is a lot clamer now as I have started a new job and have finished school so I should get a chapter out every other week.**

**I hope you enjoyed it **

**reviews make me happy and write faster :)**


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